THERE is a programme on the TV about some chaps who head out into the Barents Sea to catch crab.
Crabs so big that if they could fly they would be the biggest flying crabs that ever flew.
Claw blimey! As the Anchorage Sun headlined the story.
This is crazy work with the threat of death by extreme dampness ever attendant.
These men use a powerful drug to get to sea for the six-week king crab season - money.
The only other place I know where you can earn so much in such a short time is the BBC.
Every now and again the crabbing programme will mention Kodiak Island and there are three things you should know about this lump of sub-arctic rock.
It is cold.
No, colder than that.
Kodiak is the 80 largest island in the word, slightly larger than Cyprus.
But much colder.
The most popular car is not the Mazda MX-5 because taking your top off here will, quite literally, freeze them off.
What you want is something with all-wheel drive, although local listings have a Chrysler Crossfire for sale which even has dodgy handling before you start it up and a Lambo Murcielago.
Pays well does the crab job.
Anyway, Skoda is so pleased with the talents of its crossover Kodiaq it almost named it after the island but in fact references the local brown bear and the native naming of animals with a Q.
Now I don't doubt that the 4x4 versions will be an enviable addition to life in the snow but the reality is that this car will most likely not to see a lot of fur trade action.
The only crab it will carry is tinned by Princes.
At the top end of the scale it is about luxury; as luxurious as a pair of beaver lined oilskins.
Which is why we are peering into the depths of the Kodiaq Edition, £37k of prime 4x4 which can scuttle over terrain many will never dream of crossing while making life on the road the very opposite of a rough passage.
Powered by a 188bhp two-litre diesel engine common to the VW Tiguan and SEAT Ateca, the Kodiaq Edition offers a refined ride, almost 50mpg and far from sluggish performance with 62mph arriving in 9.1 seconds.
Power is transmitted to all four wheels through a six-speed DSG gearbox using an electronic system which will decouple rear drive to save fuel.
If you hit the mud there is an AWD button which brings in the big guns.
Actually, guns, fishing rods, horsies and boats - there is an auto trailer reversing option - are just the sort things this car was made for.
That is not to say the real world of towns and motorways has been forgotten.
It is a great cruiser and suitably agile in the city.
Ride is firm and not without its cornering talents and you can select comfort mode for added relaxation.
The standard equipment list is ludicrous.
Leaving aside leather upholstery, 19-inch alloys and seven seat practicality the Edition is wired up to just about everything imaginable and as automated as an army of robots.
Yes, all the safety needs are here, a long list of acronyms including RBS which I thought was a bank and maybe it is, every other consideration has be thought of, including an online system and SD card reader.
An eight-inch touchscreen houses the navigator, all the required sensors for the clumsy of parking, we find personal comfort zones, electric seats, foot operated tailgate - look, I am losing valuable fishing time recounting this list.
What often defines the best is thoughtfulness where small features are concerned.
The front doors have umbrellas in them, a torch is mounted in the boot area and the wireless phone charger is a box so you won't be tempted to be naughty while driving.
Why would you with Bluetooth?
The Kodiaq even has a small net mounted to the passenger side of the centre console.
It's for storage on the journey not catching live bait, should you be wondering.